The opportunities for Moon Water
We can finally learn if Lunar dust works like Kool-Aid.
Discovering a Moist Moon
Here at the Fake Science laboratories, we’d been planning a special edition of this newsletter all about licking your fingers to open those grocery bags you put vegetables in.
However, NASA’s recent news about water on the moon has turned our world upside down, though that was actually good, since a lot of our stuff was glued to the ceiling due to frustrated interns who think that “hilarious pranks” are a way to “get back at us” for “not giving them college credit.”
The news of water on the moon means a lot for us here on Earth. For one, NASA’s able to reallocate its budget for moist toilettes to plain toilettes. But there are other benefits too.
With water on the moon, it becomes increasingly likely that we’ll discover life on the moon. It’s likely to be some tiny bacteria or virus or something, but until that moment happens, we’ll continue filling our notebooks with sketches of Boris the Moon Bear.
The presence of water on the moon means one thing for certain: we need to give up on Earth even more quickly than we were planning. At this rate, Mars probably has way more stuff than we thought, including geysers that shoot daiquiris.
There’s no question: we’re renaming lunar moisture Moon Juice, and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Is moon farming in our future? The answer is yes. We will soak up the water until there’s nothing left and have three ears of corn to show for it. Then it’s on to Venus!
From the Lab
Spray some moon water in your friends’ direction.
Today’s Classic Lesson
